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Selecting the Perfect Family Therapist for You

Ramneek Kapoor

It’s commendable that you’ve made the decision to seek help from a professional family therapist after much consideration and encouragement. This is an important step towards addressing the issues within your family dynamics. To ensure that this endeavor is fruitful, it’s essential to choose the right therapist who can understand your situation, provide insights, and assist both partners in making informed decisions with confidentiality.

Choosing a family therapist is not merely about finding a professional to listen to your concerns; it’s about selecting a compassionate and knowledgeable guide who can navigate through the complexities of familial relationships. 

Take Seema’s experience, for example. She faced marital challenges but was hastily taken to a psychiatrist/psychotherapist by her family, overlooking the underlying relationship issues. This rushed decision led to wasted time and resources, as well as unwarranted stigma attached to Seema.

To avoid such pitfalls, consider the following guidelines:

  1. Research Online: Begin your search by exploring family therapists in your area or those who are available for sessions online. Pay attention to ratings and reviews from verified clients.
  2. Seek Recommendations: While discussing personal matters with friends might be challenging, remember that family therapy encompasses a broad spectrum of issues affecting various family members. Some friends or family might have valuable recommendations based on their experiences. Keep in mind the importance of confidentiality, but also remember that all therapy sessions are strictly confidential.
  3. Review Client Feedback: Read comments and recommendations from previous clients to gauge therapist satisfaction levels. Trust your instincts when evaluating feedback.
  4. Consider Therapist Gender: Choose a therapist whose gender you feel comfortable with. Some clinics offer both male and female therapists, and some even provide couple therapy with both partners.
  5. Differentiate Between Family Therapists and Psychologists: Ensure that the therapist has specific qualifications and credentials in family therapy, in addition to a psychology degree. Family therapists specialize in relationship dynamics within families, while psychologists focus more on individual psychological issues.
  6. Schedule Appointments: Don’t procrastinate reaching out to therapists. Make phone calls to discuss your needs briefly and schedule appointments for in-person visits. While online counseling is an option, face-to-face sessions may be preferable, especially if multiple family members will be involved.

By following these steps, you’re on track to finding a family therapist who can provide the support and guidance needed to navigate your family dynamics effectively.

A Guide to Understanding Couples Therapy

Ramneek Kapoor

In many societies, the mere mention of seeking help from a psychiatrist or psychologist can evoke a plethora of taboos, fears, and stigmas. But what about the journey of couples who dare to seek assistance from a family therapist?

In this blog post, we will talk about the challenges couples face in accessing therapy, the signs indicating the need for professional help, and the process of couples therapy itself.

Breaking the Taboo: Accessing Couples Therapy

Picture this: a couple caught in a whirlwind of disagreements and disputes, yet hesitating to seek professional help. Why? Because in their society, approaching a therapist carries the weight of stigma. It’s seen as a step towards airing complaints against one’s partner, a move laden with fear of judgment from family and friends. So, instead of seeking support, many couples choose to suffer in silence.

The reluctance to access therapy stems from the pervasive belief of “What would people say?” Couples fear the repercussions of disclosing their marital problems to their social circles, preferring to keep their struggles hidden. But as we’ll explore, recognizing the need for therapy is the first step towards healing a fractured relationship.

Recognizing the Signs: When to Seek Help

When is it time to reach out to a family therapist? The signs are subtle yet significant. When communication devolves into constant irritation and arguments, when love dwindles, and acceptance wanes day by day, it’s time to pause and reflect. Resentment towards one’s partner or a loss of interest in shared activities are red flags signaling the need for professional intervention.

Yet, despite these signs, many couples hesitate to take the plunge. The fear of judgment, coupled with societal pressure to maintain appearances, acts as a barrier to seeking help. However, it’s essential to recognize that seeking therapy is not a sign of weakness but a courageous step towards rebuilding a fractured relationship.

The Therapeutic Journey: What to Expect

So, what does the process of couples therapy entail? It begins with an introductory session where the therapist delves into the couple’s issues, family dynamics, and communication patterns. This initial assessment provides a foundation for deeper exploration in subsequent sessions.

Contrary to popular belief, therapists do not serve as judges or mediators. Instead, they act as facilitators, guiding couples towards understanding and resolving their conflicts. Topics explored in therapy sessions range from in-law relationships and household responsibilities to communication patterns and sexual dynamics.

A skilled therapist helps couples gain new perspectives on their relationship dynamics over sessions spanning several months. Through open communication and negotiation, couples gradually rebuild trust and acceptance within their relationship.

Overcoming Stigma: The Importance of Seeking Help

In societies where seeking therapy is stigmatized, breaking the silence surrounding mental health is crucial. By sharing their experiences and seeking support, couples can challenge societal norms and pave the way for others to access the help they need.

It’s time to destigmatize therapy and recognize it as a valuable resource for couples facing challenges in their relationship. Seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a courageous step towards healing and growth.

Conclusion: Empowering Couples to Seek Help

In a society where stigma surrounds mental health, accessing couples therapy can feel like an uphill battle. Yet, by recognizing the signs and overcoming the fear of judgment, couples can embark on a journey towards healing and growth.

Through open communication, negotiation, and the guidance of a skilled therapist, couples can rebuild trust and acceptance within their relationship. It’s time to break the silence surrounding therapy and empower couples to seek the help they need to thrive.

Why Couples Get Stressed and Look at Partners as -“Not So OK Spouse”- Hope It’s Not Happening to Your Family

Ramneek Kapoor

Rhea (name changed) had been wondering where had she gone wrong in her decision to make her marriage a dream marriage that she had always dreamt about.

She had wanted her marriage to be a mean to her happiness and love. She wanted to share a home full of marital bliss with her life partner Sam. Those two had always been looked upon as if they were a kind of made for each other couple during the six month long courtship. It wasn’t long since everyone at their reception ceremony had praised their complementing and completing each other .

Yet something went wrong immediately after they had returned from their honeymoon. She to utter dismay felt that she was not able to cope up with the demands being made on her by the family members of Sam. She was feeling bad that she had not come up to the expectations of her mother in law. Her husband would often find her guilty of having upset his mother. Her mother in law would insult her, in the kitchen and would not allow her to cook anything.

If she had really been trained to be a housewife only things would have been different. She has been a professional programmer in an I.T. company and her husband who worked alongside her in the same organisation knew it very well. Then why this sudden demand of attending to household work .She would get into the bed room to discuss the post wedding trauma with her husband who often refused to discuss anything about his mother’s stand.

Jatin’s (name changed) wife had left home to be with her mother for a week, has not returned now for many months as she decided to get out of the marriage because Jatin has not been taking her out to their regular pub joint after marriage as had been promised by him before they got married.

Ruby and Rohit (names changed) had a long history of having been in love with each other from their childhood days and their courtship continued for more than twenty years before they decided to tie their knot. But after marriage everything turned tipsy turvy when Ruby found out that Rohit had been two timing even when he was into relationship with her .

Some of these young people may appear to be living next to us or people could be within us. But young marriages are not the only ones having jolts and jitters. Couples in their fifties and sixties years of age too have been having tough time in current situations as they either moot separation or move forward to a divorce.

Said Sudhir (name changed) “Our journey towards a blessed relationship of matrimony happened 19 years ago. We have two sons (17 and 12) . Recently I saw my wife talking to someone on social media Thereafter it has been a journey full of hardships and everyday fights. My marriage and its subsequent outcome had far-reaching effects on both my emotional and physical heath, as well as my self esteem and personal identity. I have decided to end this tortuous relationship.

Marriage is changing and evolving. Its meaning in all strata of society, be it young, old, middle aged couples ,any income group is not the same any more .

We have had and we continue getting couples from any age group ,financial and milieu as you have read in some of the cases mentioned above .

A life long commitment to matrimonial relationship is a turning into a burden for some of the young couples .And some of the elderly couples feel it has been a difficult journey . They want to bring it to an end .But the decision to separate , from your partner with whom you have been planning to turn your dreams into a reality and walk hand in hand with each other ;to separate marital life to finally making the decision to proceed with a divorce and to coping with the stress and heartache is not so easy either ..

This is where we at Family Therapy India can help couples like above and many others who are facing turmoils into their relationships .

Our Family Therapy ,Relationship and marriage counselling sessions can help you change your life for the better.

You can learn how your personal choices are affecting your life, and that your happiness is up to you. You can’t always change your circumstances, or the situations you face in your life, but you can change how you act or react to those circumstances. It is up to you to decide what your future will look like, and to create your own happily ever after. Our family therapy ,Relationship and marriage counselling can help you find yourself, and let go of the feelings of anger, frustration, betrayal, and despair that are holding you back. It can teach you how to set goals and move toward a positive and successful future within your marriage, You can learn how to make permanent, lasting changes that benefit both of you and of course other members of your family.

Our Emotions Focussed Therapy and Counselling can help you regulate your emotions and learn the process of the best decision making on personal, financial, and practical aspects of your life that will develop better understanding for you and your partner to reaffirm your relationship.

We offer Family therapy , relationship and marriage Counselling sessions for families ,men, women and couples who are living with children, recently married, thinking of separation, getting a divorce, or experiencing relationship difficulties .We strongly believe in helping all those couples who are facing difficulties within their relationship at any age to understand each other’s mental and emotional state . We help them to set their communication better and overcome obstacles that are preventing them from achieving the happiness they deserve.

Get in touch with us today or write to us mansikpramarsh@gmail.com

The Woes of a Dysfunctional Family -We Help You Resolve Them

Ramneek Kapoor

Members of families in their ignorance or sometimes deliberately hurt each other to cause an unending mental emotional pain. Although a good family is meant to help individual members develop themselves to their full potential but chains of miscommunications, uncalled for egos, familial fights, discords and long-drawn-out misunderstandings result into a dysfunctional family hampering not only relationships but also a complete non achievement of personal career goals by individuals.

Kritika and Vijay (names changed) have been victims of two such grossly dysfunctional families themselves in their young age prior to their marriage and have till date (even after a decade of their having been married) not been able to overcome traumas of their young days in their parental homes. Resultantly now their children suffer from traumas of dis -functioning of their own families.

Little girl doesn’t want to hear arguing of parents

Dr Kritika (name changed) and her two siblings have been witnessing painful fights of their parents all through their life where a triangular drama would take place every day and night with sibling shifting allegiances and taking sides sometimes with their father, another time with mother or being at war with each other. These fights still continue even though all siblings have chosen their own paths in life, they continue abhorring each other. Kritika’ s all efforts to bring her parents and siblings together again is not being accepted by others of family resultantly their deadlock remains.

Such painful family events and interactions leave intense hurts, personality issues, traumas and social adjustment issues all through life. Sejal, Sonia, Kamolika, Anand, Sumit (fictitious names ) and many others such people have been suffering PTSD, Anxieties ,Mistrusts ,phobias ,adjustment issues after they lived through such most painful family dramas and now they suffer alongside their children and spouses too because of the torments of the past .

The indelible scars of family fights destabilise the psyches of family members, have impacted their relationships, job performance and emotional stability all through the life. We have been helping many of such families deal with such dis functioning, Traumatic experiences childhood scars, depression anxiety and stresses to enable them understand what emotions prevailed when the dis functioning occurred, and how these family members could not deal with their as well as their parents’ partners, children and their siblings’ similar experiences —in which their entire family had suffered and many of them still suffer.

Understanding Triangulation of the dis functioning.

The functioning of any family gets disturbed when the normal day to day interaction with each other turns into accusations of not fulfilling expectations. Or when communication is not understood in the right perceptive or when the words used for emotions do not convey the spirit behind but the use of those words and dialogues or when patience is short lived and angers flare up.

In any such situation, the battle field turns into the members un knowingly playing the roles of perpetrators, victims or the negotiators who often act as mediators or pacifiers. But sometimes they also end up taking sides with either one. We believe every household or a family can get into such a situation one time or the other. However, if such a situation continues or comes up recurrently is the cause for alarm. Because if not resolved at the appropriate time it can turn onto a chronic dis functioning of the family.

A new understanding and perception of dealing with those situations have helped these families deal with and each individual member transformed into a stable, loving, mature, and dependable person, attaining their best personal success after they have come over to Family Therapy India.

If your family is one such family suffering from misfunctioning and traumas of the past . It is time now to help your family overcome such disputes, ego bruises, mistrusts and angers of the past. Take control of your life and feelings, and help others understand the need for curing their feelings. Know that we can help you bring about a positive change in your filial relationships. With commitment and time and our expert counseling sessions of family therapy, healing begins steadily and gradually until the family adopts the new normal relationships.

KEEPING MARIAGE ALIVE

Ramneek Kapoor

Relationship Advice – Happy Vs. Unhappy Couples – Tips for Building a life lasting Relationship between Two People who are in Love

It is wonderful feeling to be in love and date each other. While dating prior to the commitment made to each other for a long term relationship, the couples meet for a while and then pine for each other till they meet at the next date. Everything is seen by them from behind the rosy shades of love and affection for each other. The emotions of possessiveness and yearning do not bring in the mundane communication of a daily grinds of life. But being in a long-term relationship isn’t merely pining for the lover’s physical intimacy alone.

Being in long term relationships will involve managing and taking care of many other lives in addition to the lives of the lovers. And it is not an easy task. . Both people need to accommodate themselves to new family atmosphere and new relationships in their lives. Gradually they will have to raise their own families to make their family a complete unit. They need to then communicate over many other issues in addition to the romance and love in marriage. Their issues that gain priority over love may pertain to jobs and careers, money and household expense, household work and taking care of the babies, social, cultural and religious affairs, parenting and in many cases taking care of the aged and old in the families. As a couple begins their journey into the long-term relationship of wedded bliss, their love for each other many a times may take a back seat and the love gets reduced to a few stolen kisses and quickies here and there.

The couple forgets about nurturing and keeping the flame of love and desire for each other alive. Soon the infatuation of physical hunger wears off and then the focus shifts from the affection to the problems. The stark realities of need for more money, career priorities and of culture, of religion, and of family may cause concerns and small squabbles. Before these squabbles get blown into major issues and a beautiful relationship begins to disintegrate. The couple needs to understand that every relationship is important in life and more so with the one with whom you have to spend your life time. Needless to say, that every difference and misunderstanding should be treated as worth working for and saving, once the infatuation begins to fade. Communication is the only tool and doorway to establish a better understanding; essentially the couple, need to take    up all those problems that are causing strangled relationship .